Taylor says:
I found out husband masturbated this morning after he woke me up and
started getting ready for work. I'm really disappointed, sad, and feel
angry that he didn't with me. He would have rathered jerked one while
eating breakfast. How do I know...the washcloth he used to clean
himself off with was in the basket and sorry to be explicit, but I know
what he smells like because I give him BJ very frequently.
He never
gave me the sign that he wanted sex, just his normal hug and kiss and out
to the kitchen where he looks at the computer. It makes me feel like a
nobody, nothing and something physically he doesn't want to be with.
We have great sex when we do, but that is to his boundry of only ever
three day rule. I want it everyday and he knows this. Simply, he
doesn't want it with me all the time like I do, he wants it (mentally)
with other women.
He also knows that I will do everything in the
bedroom, EVERYTHING...I never say no and he says I fullfill every
fantasy but now I know or have known this is a lie. I WANT TO KNOW
WHY??? DO I masturbate, hell no! Do I fantasize, Hell no, why should I
when I have him. I don't think like other women do.
I'm seriously
thinking about asking him about this plus telling him we need a
separation physically. This whole thing makes me very uncomfortable and
second best. Can someone with a heart and no hurtful words please tell
me what to do in this situation. I'm so uncomfortable with him right
now when he calls at lunch I don't think I can talk.
You certainly have to talk about this but you are a little naive about
the nature of men. ALL men masturbate and fantasize no matter how great
their relationships and sex life is. That in itself doesn't mean there
is anything wrong with you or your relationship. The reason we do it is
mainly because we can be completely selfish in our fantasies without
hurting or disappointing real women - it is a mental as well as physical
relief.
The REAL issue here is why is he imposing this 3-day rule? Once that is
understood, you can find an answer together. Does he feel overwhelmed by
your sexual appetite? Is it a power trip? Does he have performance
anxiety? By all means ask him why he's masturbating when you'd gladly
have sex with him, but don't pre-judge him - he could be very happy with
you and have personal issues.
And by the way, if you are sexually frustrated, there's no reason why
you shouldn't masturbate - it's not disloyalty, just harmless relief -
and actually quite good for you.
No comments:
Post a Comment