Tuesday 18 February 2014

How can I forgive myself?

fergiedoggy says:
I'm really upset and scaredHi all
I'm not asking for niceness but I feel extremely low
I stupidly fell for a guy that was attached we were good friends and he helped me through a. Lot of personal stuff he was with a girl he bought a house with. He told everyone at work they weren't getting in and she was this that etc
We began working together a lot and he was paying me compliments very charming Etc and sending me poems chatting to me for hours etc
I started falling for him and eventually we did kiss a few times
After that he became distant and cold and my confidence plummeted I didn't know what I'd done so I began calling and texting a lot
Last year he kept me at distance by text and would see me
Towards the end if last year he said my worrying and anxiety was getting too much and cut ties
I blamed myself and have tried 3 times since to see him at work and he's given me a final warning to stay away :(
I feel like one of those creepy stalkers and I'm not
Please help me forgive myself :( 


What's going on here is that you fell for a guy who used you, and you tried to cling on to him for too long and now you feel guilty about the whole thing.
When we fall for someone, we're no longer fully in control of ourselves. We do and say things our logic and intuition would rather we didn't. EVERYBODY when put in the wrong situation is capable of doing the wrong thing.

It's time to forgive yourself. he led you on and played with your feelings in the first place. None of this makes you a bad person. Time to get your focus on right now. When you lose, don't lose the lesson. What you experienced makes you a slightly wiser and different person, so stop punishing yourself for being who you were. All the things we regret in life help us lead better lives now.

Also, be aware that just because guys show you kindness and affection doesn't mean they're nice right through to the core. Time to move on sweetheart.

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